Orlando Divorce counseling is no longer seen as a last resort during the difficult time of separation. It is estimated that 50% of couples today in the U.S. are ending up in divorce. There are several reasons why couples get divorced. For many it is a mix of reasons and not just one. Listed below are some of the following reasons that have been identified the most common leading factors of divorce:
- The lack or loss of commitment. Getting married at a young age. The feeling you married the wrong partner.
- Cheating and Infidelity.
- Issues of communication and the constant arguing that ensues.
- Feeling of inequality in the marriagse. Especially around the issues regarding raising the kids and roles and responsibilities.
- Physical, emotional and/or chemical substance abuse.
- The placement of unrealistic expectations as to what marriage should be like.
- Increased financial strain and problems with disagreements in regards to money.
Orlando Divorce Counseling - The Breakdown
- Criticism and nagging between the partners.
Always pointing fingers and blaming the other.
- Lack of respecting one another.
If not caught early on in relationships this can start early in the marriage.
- Defensiveness of each partner.
A partner that cannot take ownership and responsibility for problems is not able to fix them. They will never see that that they contribute equally to the issues.
- Stonewalling each other.
This is deliberately avoiding any interaction and the discussion of any problems. Stonewalling makes it impossible to agree and to resolve any arguments.
Orlando Divorce Counseling - Finding a Therapist
Divorce leads to mental health strain and conditions related to increased depression, anxiety about the future, and internal turmoil. Many perceive the divorce as very personal. They see themselves as a failure. Therapy assist with feelings and internal self dialogue causing pain.
You can learn to re-frame the divorce. You will gain an entirely new perspective. Personally in my own practice, I have worked with several to understand how turning a painful experience into a positive one is possible. Clients are able to start sifting and sorting through the idea of who they are. Outside of the context of marriage. They discover what they will and will not settle for. As an individual and as a partner in a relationship.
Therapist are mediators. Counselors set the guidelines to make the transition to divorce as smooth as possible. This is true with children involved. With the help of a therapist, issue related to parenting custody, finances, living arrangements, etc, are peacefully resolved.
Divorce Affects the Children
Therapy is tremendously important and beneficial for children of divorcing parents. Adults become consumed with emotions. Most children go unseen. They become scared, confused, upset and feel a sense of abandonment. Children start blaming themselves to make sense of what is going on. They may start to caretaker the adults feelings. Their job is to always and only be a child.
Parentification is the act of a child who takes on the role of an adult when they sense the ball is being dropped. Children that see their parents act out in aggression and anger towards each other, become fearful and confused. Listening to arguments related to custody instantly places them into feelings of fear and abandonment. Seeking child counseling is a must if they are going to learn to not personalize the divorce.
It would be great if all of the family members could discuss openly their feelings and about any issues arising as the result of a divorce. They are better able to process the turmoil and emotions going on inside of them. This leads to assisting all to better adjusting to the sudden changes.
Orlando Divorce Counseling and Adjusting
The recovery from a divorce is a process. The adjustment to changes occur at a different pace for all of those involved. It takes time. Divorce counseling Orlando recognizes the persons life has changed dramatically. There are fears and worry around finances, employment, changes in housing and custody of the children to name a few. Parents feel tremendous amounts of guilt. Many see the emotional effects the divorce has on their children.
There is hope and Orlando divorce counseling can assist in making this a smooth transition. It does take the willingness to look at yourself and not stay in the victim mentality or the blame game. It’s important to look at reality. Face the fear, sadness, etc. Don’t try to convince yourself you are alright. Allow yourself the time grieve. You will realize that your better able to move through it and onto the other side of happiness and peace.