Marriage Problems Orlando and Finding Solutions
Marriage problems Orlando and getting the help you need. Every couple runs into bumps along the path of their relationship. Situations that are upsetting often lead to serious marital problems. The things is this, couples that have the ability to talk in a peaceful way about what is troubling them are able to have a quick turnaround. They see that each other are coming from their frame of reference and that it is not always so black and white. Resentments and anger are not swelling up inside of them. They address the issues head on and move right through them.
Those couples unable to have these skills will find even the smallest problems to be major hurdles and obstacles. This is followed with distrust, needing to be right, not compromising and resentment. Both tend to dig their heels in and hit below the belt. Often times they cannot even remember what the argument was about.
Help for Marriage Problems Orlando
Do you and your partner tend to give up when you get into a disagreement?
When you are not getting the results you want how do you respond? Do you sulk and go lick your wounds? Are you more the imploder that holds it in? Maybe you feel like it just isn’t worth it. Do you feel like getting what you want isn’t worth the fight? Yielding leads to symptoms like depression and resentment.
Instead of getting frustrated and angry first consider the fact that your partner may be acting from a place where they truly believe they are right and that it makes sense to them. Maybe we do not always see why our partner does certain behaviors. Ask yourself, “What does the behavior being displayed by my partner mean?” Seek to understand than to always be understood.
A challenge for many marriage problems Orlando is with dealing with frustration between the way men and women handle and deal with conflict. They deal in totally separate ways. Women seem to want to discuss how they feel while this makes men feel more nervous and anxious. We see that when men get upset many will choose to walk rather than stay and fight. This leaves the women feeling deserted. This causes a lot of misunderstanding. If there can be a way to approach a discussion with kindness, patience and the ability to listen, you both will see results.
Do you and your partner find yourselves dodging topics that you both perceive as touchy? Many professionals have termed this “freezing”. You freeze and instead of communicating, you go silent. Tension is now created.
Marriage Problems Orlando
Strategies that Work
If you find that you cannot “communicate” and you find yourself raising your voice then take it to a public place. Go to a park or to the library. This way you know that you must temper your emotions. No one likes to lose their cool at a library.
Set up some rules that work
Do not interrupt your partner until they are done talking. Try to avoid extreme words such as always and never. These words are assuming your partner never has once done the action and are used when you are heated.
Utilize your body language
In order to show your partner that you are listening. Put down the phone or book and don’t be picking your nails. Make sure you are making eye contact and nod your head and let the other know your really listening. Paraphrase back what you heard your partner say so they know that you heard it clearly.
Create a list of the issues.
Write down the topics that you have the most disagreements about. Also make sure to put on the list the ones that you do not talk about that could lead to anger and arguing.
Set up some rules that work
Do not interrupt your partner until they are done talking. Try to avoid extreme words such as always and never. These words are assuming your partner never has once done the action and are used when you are heated.
Keep the focus on yourself.
Stop trying to get your partner to always change.This just creates the other becoming defensive. Not many people like to be told always that they are doing everything wrong. Take the time through counseling and introspective work to figure out what you can do differently.
Knock it off.
The negative mudslinging is very unhealthy and unhelpful. It can destroy a marriage. Stop with the finger pointing, hits below the belt, sarcastic comments, digs that are mean, etc. Stop escalating each other. Stay calm. If one of you gets heated than the other needs to calmly leave. The other partner will have no choice but to drop the issue. Just tell your partner: “This is going nowhere. Let’s calm down and try to discuss this again shortly.”
Learn the art of making decisions in a cooperative and collaborative way.
This is a plan that leaves you both satisfied and pleased. Getting your way is not the point. When you find you have differences, go directly to explaining the underlying concern. Listen to the concern of your partner and quickly both create a solution together.
Marriage Problems Orlando
Counseling
There is help for marriage problems available. Seek counseling today and start to implement these above listed strategies. Be human enough to admit that your not always right. That you could use a therapist to help guide you not how through. There are countless benefits to therapy.
Couples can receive individual and marriage counseling together. Give it a try. What do you have to lose? Understand my approach and see how lasting change can happen. Help for marriage problems is only a phone call away.
