Relationship Counselling and couples therapy. How to find a therapist you both feel comfortable with. This is crucial for the success of therapy. Both must feel heard, validated and part of a team working toward the same common goal. If you want to be assured that you have the right therapist, I suggest you both do the following:
- Interview over the phone the therapist. See how they sound and understand their approach.
- Don’t be lazy and let your partner do all the work in finding the therapist. This leads you to believe that they have found one that will adhere to their desire and point of view.
- You have every right to ask how ever many questions you may have about the process of counseling and what approaches the therapist may use for your particular issue.
Across the board there are common myths many couples and individuals have about seeing a therapist. The following are just a few I see day to day.
People that are deemed crazy see a therapist.
This is far from true. There is a very wide range of individuals and couples that seek help from a therapist. Many balanced, healthy and very successful people seek the help of a therapist to work through a tough knot or spot in their life. They are smart enough to know that their thinking got them into the perceived problem and it cannot get them out. A good therapist is able to stay objective and see outside of the blinders we wear.
A total stranger is not going to know how to help me.
This is the very reason that I can help you. I am impartial to taking any one side. As your therapist I must be unbiased in order to remain objective. I am able to see outside of the system.
Therapist should be able to fix all of the problems.
No this is far from true. I can only work as hard as your willing to work. If you stay blocked and defensive then I won’t work harder than you to help. If you open up to the process then I am better able to see more depth and layers to pull from. You will be able to gain the awareness you need.
Couples Counselors take Sides.
No we do not take sides. It is the fact that you are so used to telling your friends and family who are biased and opinionated when it comes to your problems. They all have their own ideas and opinions on who is right and who is wrong. My job is to stay neutral but yet hold you and your partner accountable for the way you speak and the meaning behind the message.
Therapists just sit there and do not talk
I am extremely interactive. Just as talkative if not more than my clients. I get in there and start seeking and sorting out to understand each persons thought process and patterns. Trust me after an hour and half I feel like a ran a marathon.
Starting the Real Work
What do you have to lose? Your relationship is already suffering. Why Drop your pride and ego as well as the misconceptions you have about therapy. Learn the ability to effectively speak with intention and listen with clarity. Call today and let’s start.